You may have read my earlier posts about an outhouse collection and the joke about Sears' catalogue?
I have quite a repertoire of stories about outhouses and bathrooms, but I don't tell them much any more so I have decided to do a series of postings about them. Maybe enough to compile a short book for use in the bathroom, (the outhouse, the john, the head, the privy, the loo, the lavatory, the little girls' room, the office, the necessary, the ladies, the gents, the water closet, the library, the washroom, the restroom, the convenience, the comfort station, the duty station) while sitting on the toilet, (the stool, the pot, the throne, the crapper, the commode, the can).
I didn't set out in life to develop a set of toilet tales. I didn't even realize I told so many (too many?) until fellow workers at St. V's gave me an unusual gift - a portable roll of toilet paper. Apparently, when I returned from a tour abroad, I had more stories about European bathrooms than museums.
I can't help it if humorous things happen in outhouses and bathrooms. It's part of life and life is funny when you see it from my side of the door. And as Mike would say, "It's my duty to share my observations with the rest of the world."
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
Sunday, October 09, 2005
Tomorrow
Tomorrow is my birthday.
That means I can eat chocolate cake with icing and ice cream. I can buy books and a new outfit and new shoes and another new outfit and a couple more books. And if anybody says anything, I can smile sweetly and say, "But it's my birthday."
To be truthful, at my age and state of independence, it's usually only the little voice inside my head that has the nerve to ask, "Don't you think you are going overboard?" And I probably won't smile sweetly or say anything, I'll just ignore it.
Sometimes it's best just to pretend that little voice doesn't exist. Sometimes the little voice is really annoying.
That means I can eat chocolate cake with icing and ice cream. I can buy books and a new outfit and new shoes and another new outfit and a couple more books. And if anybody says anything, I can smile sweetly and say, "But it's my birthday."
To be truthful, at my age and state of independence, it's usually only the little voice inside my head that has the nerve to ask, "Don't you think you are going overboard?" And I probably won't smile sweetly or say anything, I'll just ignore it.
Sometimes it's best just to pretend that little voice doesn't exist. Sometimes the little voice is really annoying.
Thursday, October 06, 2005
Autumn
It's October and, therefore, autumn in Indiana. One of my favorite times of the year. It's probably what I missed most about Indiana when I lived in the south where they had two seasons, tourist and off.
I probably wouldn't feel the same way about autumn if I had to rake leaves, but I now live in an apartment and someone does that for me. One of the perks of growing old.
The last time I remember raking leaves was when I lived in Florida. It must have been autumn, or probably winter because the "snow birds" had arrived next door. These particular snow birds were a very nice couple from somewhere up north who rented a house next to my parents' home every winter.
I no longer remember their names, but I remember the mister liked to work in their little yard to keep busy. He especially seemed to enjoy raking leaves. So I'd rake the leaves from my parents' yard into his just to give him something to do.
I probably wouldn't feel the same way about autumn if I had to rake leaves, but I now live in an apartment and someone does that for me. One of the perks of growing old.
The last time I remember raking leaves was when I lived in Florida. It must have been autumn, or probably winter because the "snow birds" had arrived next door. These particular snow birds were a very nice couple from somewhere up north who rented a house next to my parents' home every winter.
I no longer remember their names, but I remember the mister liked to work in their little yard to keep busy. He especially seemed to enjoy raking leaves. So I'd rake the leaves from my parents' yard into his just to give him something to do.
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
Only in Indiana
Looking for something to do this month?
I've never been there, but this place comes highly recommended - the Tel-Hy Nature Preserve in Huntington County.
ACRES describes it as "high bluffs giving a splendid view of the winding Wabash River, ... alive with wildflowers and large, old trees. Ravines ...beech and hard maple ... hillsides display patches of wild ginger, celandine poppy, Virginia blue bell, and rue anemone."
At this time of year, there may not be many blooming wildflowers, but the ravines should be awash in enough autumn color for everyone to say, "Ooohhh".
Not to mention, that while you’re there you can tour Hy Goldenberg’s outhouse collection. Yep, the old outhouse collection.
Go to http://www.acres-land-trust.org/preserve-Tel-Hy.htm to see pictures of the privies as well as the wildflowers.
What more could you ask for a weekend road trip?
I've never been there, but this place comes highly recommended - the Tel-Hy Nature Preserve in Huntington County.
ACRES describes it as "high bluffs giving a splendid view of the winding Wabash River, ... alive with wildflowers and large, old trees. Ravines ...beech and hard maple ... hillsides display patches of wild ginger, celandine poppy, Virginia blue bell, and rue anemone."
At this time of year, there may not be many blooming wildflowers, but the ravines should be awash in enough autumn color for everyone to say, "Ooohhh".
Not to mention, that while you’re there you can tour Hy Goldenberg’s outhouse collection. Yep, the old outhouse collection.
Go to http://www.acres-land-trust.org/preserve-Tel-Hy.htm to see pictures of the privies as well as the wildflowers.
What more could you ask for a weekend road trip?
Sunday, October 02, 2005
Halloween Stories 1
This is the first week of October so I'm going to start with a little family story about Halloween.
My grandfather was a good story telling. He would often take events that had happened to other people and tell them about himself. So would my dad. Sometimes I get confused as to who did what, but I'm fairly certain this story was about things Grandpa actually did.
When Grandpa was a young man, a teenager, he and his friends would go out on Halloween and pull one prank after another. After one such evening, the boys, quite pleased with their adventures and rather full of themselves, gathered in a corn field to brag about their feats of daring-do. One of the guys had a camera with him and offered to take a group picure to commemorate the fun.
He arranged them sitting on top of a fence rail. They posed self-consciously, trying hard not to grin, doing their best to look like tough, manly, men of the world. The photographer fussily focused the camera and pushed the button to take the picture. Water shot out of the camera, startling the group and they fell backwards off the fence. The photographer was also on the ground - rolling with laughter. It was a trick camera and they had fallen for it hook, line, and sinker.
Fifty years after it had happen, my grandfather was still chuckling everytime he told this story. It's good to have friends and fond memories you can carry with you into old age. It gives you stories to amuse your grandchildren as well as yourself.
My grandfather was a good story telling. He would often take events that had happened to other people and tell them about himself. So would my dad. Sometimes I get confused as to who did what, but I'm fairly certain this story was about things Grandpa actually did.
When Grandpa was a young man, a teenager, he and his friends would go out on Halloween and pull one prank after another. After one such evening, the boys, quite pleased with their adventures and rather full of themselves, gathered in a corn field to brag about their feats of daring-do. One of the guys had a camera with him and offered to take a group picure to commemorate the fun.
He arranged them sitting on top of a fence rail. They posed self-consciously, trying hard not to grin, doing their best to look like tough, manly, men of the world. The photographer fussily focused the camera and pushed the button to take the picture. Water shot out of the camera, startling the group and they fell backwards off the fence. The photographer was also on the ground - rolling with laughter. It was a trick camera and they had fallen for it hook, line, and sinker.
Fifty years after it had happen, my grandfather was still chuckling everytime he told this story. It's good to have friends and fond memories you can carry with you into old age. It gives you stories to amuse your grandchildren as well as yourself.
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