Things I learned today

I like to learn something new every day. Sometimes I manage to learn something in the morning and then something else in the afternoon. (At my age sometimes it's the same thing.)

Today I learned about "Easter eggs". Not the Easter bunny kind of Easter egg, but the every day kind.

An "Easter egg" is any tidbit that a creator hides in computer software, movies, music, art, books, or even a watch, usually for her/his own amusement. This can be anything from the creator's name or picture, to hidden cartoons, commands, jokes, or animations. Software corporations often frown on "Easter eggs" because they can be left with egg on their face if the eggs are rotten, so if they're found, they're deleted from the next version.

Microsoft reportedly forbid the use of Easter eggs in their software several years ago, but this one works (as of Word 2003), and it's simple enough to make it work, but it's not very amusing. It may not be a real Easter egg, but some sites used it as an example so here goes.

Dummy Text - A simple programming language comes built into Microsoft Word; one Word Basic command can fill a page with dummy type.

1. Start a new document in Word.


2. Type =rand(x) in which x is a number from 0 to 200. (Like =rand(200).


3. Press Enter, and you'll see the sentence "The quick brown fox jumped over the fence" repeated five times per paragraph in x number of paragraphs.

This might be an "Easter egg": Use the thesaurus in Microsoft to look for synonyms for the word information.

If you have a Wii Fit, watch for "Easter eggs" on April Fool's Day and your birthday.

"Charlie and the Chocolate Factory": "Ed Wood" Reference: When Wonka and the others are in the elevator touring rooms, they pass a room with a bunch of pink sheep. Wonka says "I don't want to talk about it." The statement is a reference to "Ed Wood," another Tim Burton film in which Johnny Depp starred as a cross-dresser with a penchant for pink angora — material made from sheep — sweaters.

Now you can go forth and seek your own Easter eggs.

A Tale of Now and Then

I think I've mentioned that I used to follow Big Ten basketball. It was one of the sports I watched with my father to keep him company on Saturday afternoons and something we could discuss over Sunday dinner. Being a Hoosier, it was one of the few sports I actually enjoyed watching and I had a handful of favorite college teams and coaches that I followed avidly.

When Dad died, I stopped watching basketball.

I mention this because it's NCAA Tourney time and they have the games on prime time night after night and I can't watch my regularly scheduled shows. So I happened to catch the new PBS series The Legend Seekers and the preview episode, The Lively Family Massacre. It's a true story about a family that was massacred by the Indians except for one little girl, Jane.

According to the family history, Jane survived because a few weeks before the massacre her parents had given her to a passing family that had recently lost a child. It's not known why she was given away. Maybe the mother had a premonition, maybe she felt sorry for the grieving family. Makes you wonder, doesn't it?

Why would a family donate an 8 year old girl to strangers? Presumably "a passing family" was someone they'd known only a few days and would probably never see again. What were they thinking?

Did they say, "Oh, you lost a child? You poor things! Here have one of ours. We have plenty."

Were they thinking, "Thank goodness we got rid of that prissy little brat. She was worthless for farming. Now lets raise some good sturdy boys that will help cut down the timber and plow the field and shoot some bears."

What must the little girl have felt as she marched away with her new family. Was she crying, sobbing, reaching out for her parents, begging them not to make her go? Was she glad to leave? Was she loved by either family? Is it too late to care?

This is for you

Banana Orange Bread

I made banana nut bread for breakfast this morning. or perhaps I should say "brunch" since it just went in the oven and it's almost 9.

I wanted to make banana bread with orange juice since I had bananas I didn't want to eat and I had orange juice and I thought the combination sounded good. Since I was surfing the net when the idea struck me, I surfed over to Google and found a recipe on Cooking For Engineers.

I had all the ingredients mixed and was about ready to pour it into my pans when I realized I hadn't added the orange juice. I went back to the computer to find out how much juice I needed and found that the recipe didn't call for orange juice.

Strange. How could Banana Orange Bread not contain any orange?

Well, it wasn't a recipe for Banana Orange Bread, but Banana Nut Bread. Ooops! No problem. I'll just drink the orange juice while I eat the bread. That sounds like a solution an engineer would devise, doesn't it?


(Speaking of Ooops! In an earlier post, I said that I used 5 inch pans for bread in a bag but I used 7 inch pans. The 5 inch pans might be a little small for 2 loaves.)

Update: 50 minutes later -
This is some seriously good banana bread. The recipe says "Serves 10", but I think if you tried to serve this bread to 10 of your closest friends you'd have a serious fight break out.

This is what I did differently from the recipe: I had 3 bananas so I used all 3, I used pecans since I didn't have walnuts, I substitued 1/3 cup oil for 6 Tbsp melted butter and I added about a teaspoon of cinnamon. I used two small pans (7 1/2 inches long) and I added chocolate/caramel chips to one pan. The chocolate is very good, but not at all necessary. Don't overbake it! - the loaves bake a little more while cooling in the pan for 10 minutes and then while it cools (but if you can wait for it to cool, you're a better dieter than I am).

I need a plow

It feels like spring today. You still have to look for the signs, but I saw a few maple trees with red buds and the neighbor's lillies are up several inches.

I took a drive through the neighborhood on my way back from the store this afternoon. Even with the sunshine and mild weather, there weren't many people out, but I saw a few old men standing around looking like they were trying to look like they were working.

I got the urge to start farming today so I went out and poked at my two pots of hens-and-little-chicks. They all survived the winter so I put them on top of the patio fence where they could enjoy the spring weather, then I studied the little tree I planted last year until I saw some leaf buds on it. It looks like it will soon have some branches and leaves so it will stop looking like I planted a stick.

After all that, I went in the house and had a Pepsi. Farming is hard work.

It's in the bag.

I made bread-in-a-bag last weekend. It was very good even if I do say so myself. There's no proof left because I ate it, but here's the recipe if you want to try it yourself. The basil bread made lovely sandwiches, but I used small pans so I had to slice the bread lengthwise.

Bread in a Bag

Ingredients

3 cups all purpose or bread flour (more or less)
3 tablespoons powdered milk
1 package rapid rise yeast
1 cup hot water (125 to 130 degrees F)
1 teaspoon salt
3 tablespoons sugar
3 tablespoons vegetable oil
Extra flour to use during kneading process

Directions

1. Heat water in microwave with sugar and salt until it’s between 125 – 130 degrees.
2. Combine 1 cup flour, yeast, and powdered milk in a 1-gallon heavy duty plastic freezer bag. Squeeze upper part of bag to force out the air, and then seal the bag. Shake and work bag with fingers to blend ingredients.
3. Add hot water and oil to dry ingredients. Reseal bag. Mix by working bag with fingers.
4. Add 1 cup flour, reseal bag, and mix dough by working bag with fingers.
5. Add ½ cup flour, reseal bag, and continue working until the dough is completely mixed and pulls away from the bag. Work in more flour if needed, about ¼ cup at a time. (Dough should still be a little bit sticky.)
6. Take bread out of the bag and place on floured surface. Knead dough 5 - 10 minutes or until smooth and elastic. (Don't use too much flour.) Put dough back into bag and let it rest 10 minutes.
7. Divide dough in half and shape into loaves. ( I patted each half into a rectangle about 1/4 - 1/2 inch thick an 5 inches long. Then I lightly brushed them with melted butter. On one loaf I sprinkled a little dried basil and on the other I sprinkled brown sugar and cinnamon with a few raisins. Then I rolled up each dough rectangle to make the loaves and used small pans, 7 ½ x 3 1/4 x 2 ½-inches.)
8. Place in greased bread pan. Cover and let rise in a warm place until double in size, about 30 minutes. (You know it's doubled when you poke it a little with your finger, and the impression of your finger remains in the dough.)
9. Bake at 350 degrees for 20 to 30 minutes until golden brown.
10. Remove from pan and cool on wire rack or dish towels.
    

Visit these links for more recipes:

Utah State University - Complete directions for several varieties of bread-in-a-bag

AllRecipes.com

Food Down Under's Honey Wheat Bread-in-a-Bag

Cooks.com Vienna-Bread-in-a-Bag

Oh, Ho!

(Read it anyway you want.)

It seems like I'm not the only one upset about AIG's undisguised greed. Politicians are falling all over themselves trying to let us know that they're appalled. Absolutely appalled.

Well, you ought to be. You're aren't as innocent as you think we think you are. And you know it.

Greedy Little ........

This headline on MSNBC distressed me: “AIG paying millions in bonuses despite bailout”.

The Washington Post headline reads “Bailout King AIG Still to Pay Millions In Bonuses”

Here’s one from China View “AIG paying millions in bonuses despite gov’t pressure”.

And for Europeans on Newsnet 14 “AIG Paying Millions in Bonuses despite ‘Taxpayer’ bailout”

According to these articles, AIG is paying out $165 - $225 million dollars in bonuses, much of it to executives in the division that caused the multi-billion dollar loss in 2008 that led AIG to beg for tax payer money to bail them out.

One article said that our Treasury Secretary Timothy F. Geithner has “asked” AIG to scale back these bonuses in the future. (Do you think he said “Please” and “Thank you”?)

According to AIG they are contractual obligated to give bonuses to the executives that caused their multi-billion dollar losses. They claim that can face a lawsuit from their employees if they don’t pay these “retention bonuses” and AIG Chairman Edward Liddy complained that AIG could not retain “the best and brightest talent” for AIG if the employees think [they aren’t going to get their inflated salaries and bonuses whether they deserve them or not].

OK, I admit I paraphrased the part in italics. Does AIG still think they’ve got the “best and the brightest” after the company suffered a 62 billion dollar loss in the fourth quarter of 2008? This was the biggest loss in the company’s history. If I was the boss, I’d be firing people, not paying them extra to hang around and do it again.

Liddy thinks they can decrease the bonuses by about 30% in the future.

I think you can do better than that, Ed.

Does anybody else in America want to sue AIG execs to get some of their tax money back?

That time of year again

This is one of those word questions you always hated in math classes.

I was suppose to be at a writing symposium at 9 o'clock this morning. It would take one hour to drive there. I didn't get out of bed till 8:06. Now you do the math.

For those of you who are extremely math challenged: No, I didn't make it.

Why you ask did I miss this meeting which I've been looking forward to for 2 weeks? Unlike your algebra teacher, I'll give you the answer. Daylight Saving Time, that's why.

As happens twice a year since Indiana switched to this unnatural time keeping system, my inner clock is in a turmoil. Since DST started March 8, I don't know when to go to bed, I don't know when to get up, I don't know when to eat. I'm grouchy, I'm gaining weight, my head hurts, my legs ache.

I wasn't surprised to recently read that heart attacks increase 5% the week DST starts according to a study conducted in Sweden (where they call it "summer time"). And they found that the risk decreases in the autumn when we switch back to normal time. Everybody says so: Science Digest , Reuters, Mr. Hassel's Long Underpants

Some people claim the increase in heart attacks isn't due to DST, it's due to the loss of one hour of sleep. DUH! Why do you think people are losing one hour of sleep? And it's not just one hour. DST throws off your whole sleep/awake schedule. And not just for one day or even one week, but for at least a month.

There has been an increase in shootings all over the world. Domestic violence is up. Tornadoes and floods are storming through the countryside. Companies are failing. People are losing their life savings. Cows are tipping over.

And it's all the fault of Daylight Savings Time. Just do the math.

Meet me in St. Louis

I don't like meetings. Most of those at the Dumass Company are mainly held to give managers, project managers, and egotists a place to talk. And talk. And talk. And talk.

I'm invited to too many meetings. I had 3 meetings and conference calls scheduled between 11 and 1 yesterday and again today. I don't know when "they" expect me to eat lunch. I don't suppose they care.

One of the analysts I work with doesn't have 3 meetings scheduled a month, much less 3 a day. He manages this by managing to remain as uninformed about our work as possible even though he's been with the company only one less month than I have.

Today I made everybody in my department go to my first meeting of the day at 11. I'm almost ashamed of myself. It was the first time I'd been to this workgroup and I wasn't quite sure what would be on the agenda. It was so boring. The first speaker, a new manager with Dumass, promised not to bore us with his resume but he lied. Twelve job descriptions later I concluded he has difficulty holding a job.

The second speaker probably wasn't really boring, but his voice was monotone. And he repeated himself often. His had a monotone voice and was a repeater, if you know what I mean. He liked to repeat his sentences in a monotone voice. Now try listening to a monotone speech being repeated for 20 minutes and see if you're still awake.

I lied - He was boring and I'm not at all ashamed I made my co-workers suffer through that with me.

The second meeting of the day was scheduled for 12:00 and was canceled at 12:15. Sigh. Big sigh. It wasn't actually canceled. It was moved to next week.

Oh, goodie. I get to do it all again next week.

Sigh, BIG, BIG sigh.

Didn't help any

My horror-scope for tomorrow says "Somebody knows more than you know. You need to know what they know. Do they know that you need to know? If they do, why aren't they telling you? Maybe they figure that you already know."

Ah-ha! So you do know, don't you?

Huh?

My horror-scope for today said “There is something that you don't know now, but you do at least know that you don't know it. Strangely, though, you think that you understand whatever it is that you don't know.”

All I know is that I don't know so if you know, tell me and then we'll both know. OK?

Help me up

I need to get back on my soap box. Today I'm preaching about the economy.

Some companies are using this recession as an opportunity to rob the tax payers by demanding billion dollar government handouts. Their executive management teams don't understand why we're upset that they fly around on private jets that cost more per flight per person than our monthly mortgage and rent payments. They spend money on lavish parties and claim it's not wrong because they didn't use the bailout money to pay for them. Do they think we're that stupid? (The question is rhetorical, the answer is Yes, they do think we're that stupid.)

Kids know if they spend all their money on candy, they'll never be able to afford a new video game, but if they beg to Mommy and Daddy they can get both, and still afford a new pair of sneakers that glow in the dark.

Executives who think they deserve their obscene salaries caused the economic mess we're facing today. The writing has been on the wall for years that the disproportion increases in executive salaries compared to the workers' salaries was leading to financial inequalities that would cause a shift in American culture and destroy our way of life.

How are we going to turn this around? It's easier to stop a run away train than a greedy executive.

With age comes wisdom

.... more or less.

I had something interesting to write today but I've forgotten what it was. At my age I'm lucky that I can remember that I forgot something.

I'm sure you would have enjoyed it. Because I remember that it was very insightful as well as humerous.

Free Money

I occassionally read a blog from a former classmate that gives tips on living a frugal lifestyle which she adopted after her retirement. She has some good hints and good-looking recipes (I haven't tried any yet but I did add some to my recipe box.)

Recently she wrote about A Money-Free Day. One day a week she doesn't spend any money.

• She makes sure she has enough food for the day and enough gas in her car so that she doesn't have to buy those items.
• She avoids buying clothes or books.
• She doesn't go to the movies.
• You get the picture.

And she doesn't feel deprived at all.

Really?

I think at least once a month that I unintentionally have A Money-Free Week.

• I live 3 miles from work (on purpose) so I don't usually buy gas more than once a month.
• I often take my lunch to work 5 days a week and don't eat out on weekends (because it would mean getting dressed and I'm too lazy to get out of my pajamas on weekends).
• I get new clothes less than once a month (wearing pajamas saves your clothes).
• I try to avoid buying books every week because I've run out of places to put them. (That doesn't stop me from buying them once a month, I just don't get new books every week any more.)
• I go to movies less than once a year (because constant use of a remote control has given me a short attention span).

And I don't feel deprived at all.

Well, maybe a little.