Today's Topic Is........

We have a choice of topics today.
1) Old people
2) The Dumassers that work for the Dumass Company

We'll start with # 1 and see how far that gets us.  Tip: you might want to fix a plate of cheese and crackers at this point because there's going to be a lot of whine before we get done here.

Old people,

Let's start with Andy Rooney who died Friday night at the age of 92 just a month after he retired. I don't usually watch "60 Minutes".  I think they have a slant to their shows that sometimes is more entertainment than truth.  However, I made a point to watch Mr. Rooney's last broadcast.   I think his 90 was the same as some people's 60. 

Let's move on to the old people that were at Kroger's Saturday morning.  Most of them probably don't have jobs. (They were older than even me.)  Why were they shopping on a Saturday?  The sales last all week.  They should go on Tuesday afternoon when I'm at work.  But if they have to go shopping on the weekend, here are some rules they should follow to make the shopping experience more satisfying for all of us:

1. Don't stop in front of the door to ponder the wonders of the universe. 
2. Don't stop in front of the carts to check your coupons.
3. Don't leave your cart in the middle of the aisle. Especially if you're going to walk to the end of the aisle, pick up a can of beans, walk back to your cart, and then push it past the bean cans. 
4. If you want to spend 5 or 10 minutes deciding on red beans or kidney beans, no problem.  Just don't park your cart in the middle of the aisle.
5. Don't park your cart in the middle of the aisle with your purse gaping wide open.  (At your age you should know better.)
6. Don't try the pumpkin eggnog if they're giving out free samples.

Now we can discuss my favorite old person - ME!

I feel my age more than I should.  I have more aches and pains, more windiness, poorer vision, increased timidity, and I think my teeth just slipped saying timidity even though I don't wear dentures. I wheeze like a pack-a-day-smoker even though I haven't smoked 1/2 pack in my entire life.
Heaven knows I'm crankier and grouchier than I use to be so it's probably a self-defense mechanism that I'm more timid.  If I said what I was thinking half the time, I'd probably get decked a fourth of the time. 

I kicked a box in the dark Thursday night and my right knee bent backwards (more or less, mostly less).  I thought I might not be able to walk Friday, but it was fine.  However, my left leg started bothering me more than usual, then by the time I left work, the right knee was hurting and it's hurting today.  I think it's swollen and tender.  Of course, it could be tender because I keep pressing it to see if it's swollen.  The worst part is that I'm not sure which leg I'm supposed to limp on.

Well, girls and boys, we're not going to make it to the second topic today.  I have got to go get something to eat to get this pumpkin eggnog taste out of my mouth.