I have too many boyfriends

And they can't keep their hands off of me.

Al Zheimer likes to visit me at the most inconvenient times, but Gerry Atric is my constant companion.
Arthur Ritis likes to grip my right wrist and Charley Horse keeps squeezing my left calf.
Will Power shoves me out of bed every morning, which is odd because I go to bed with Johnny Walker.

I know it's an old joke, and it's too true to be funny but I couldn't help it. I'm feeling my age this week.

And yours too.

Headlines

On MSN.com today noteworthy headlines included:

1. Pilot on errant flight: 'Nobody was asleep' - Did you hear about this? The pilot and co-pilot missed the airport by 150 miles. Luckily, they realized their error before they tried to land. Whatever the reason, it must have been a doozy because they won't admit to nothin'.
2. Top 10 Homemade Buiscuit Recipes - My grandma's recipe wasn't included so they weren't really the top 10, but some look interesting. They include cornmeal buiscuits, Trisha Yearwood's "Daddy's Buiscuit" (which look good and fast), spiced buiscuits, sweet potato and pumpkin recips, and a plain recipe that uses only 2 tablespoons of buttermilk.
3. Can she stop her chin hairs from growing? - The lady who needed an answer to this question also complained that they were now gray. That seemed to be why she wanted them to stop growing. As if it didn't bother her before.
4. Man in Motorized Lounger Cited for DUI- I wanted to know how he got out of the house and if there was a cooler built into one arm or both. The article reported he was leaving a bar and the lounger had a cup holder and stereo, but said nothing about a built-in cooler.

There now you have something to talk about.

Sometimes I lisp.

I've been trying for 15 minutes to log in to this blog this evening. Now I have to go fix supper and I don't have time to think up any thing witty or pithy to say.

Well, pithy I might be able to do. If you know what I mean.

Wii and Mee

I think I told you I bought a Wii several months ago. I planned to use it to get more exercise since I can't exercise outside when it's too cold (under 50) because I wheeze nor can I exercise outside when it's too hot (over 75) because it's too hot. So far Wii hasn't motivated me to get my lazy butt off the chair more than once a month, but I do trip over the balance board frequently.

Saturday I bought the new Biggest Loser Wii game that's supposed to whip you into shape much like the TV show does its contestants. Yesterday afternoon I loaded it up and started a beginner's program. It had me warm up for 6 minutes by walking and jogging in place - not that one could see much difference between the two when I did them - then I selected an easy 16 minute upper body workout. It consisted of "boxing" and push-ups.

I like boxing. I don't like push-ups.

I did the boxing as best I could, but co-ordination is NOT my middle name and I had trouble following the simple steps. Step forward on the right foot as you punch with the right arm, touch step the left foot and jab with the left arm, step back on the left foot and then the right. Sounds easy, doesn't it?

HA! I've got 2 left feet and they both tried to do the right foot routine. Then Jillian (the trainer) threw in lifting the right knee up as you brought the right foot back. I found if I just stood on the balance board, I got a "perfect" from the feedback meter. Apparently, I'm pretty good at standing around, doing nothing.

I gave up punching and tried to get the foot work down, and almost succeeded.

Then they switched to push-ups. From the floor. I don't do floor work so I sat on the couch and watched Jillian and my fat little avitar do some "planks" and some push-ups.

Then back to the "boxing". Then back to the couch. Then back to the "boxing". Then back to the couch. I kept waiting for different exercises, but it never happened. Even Jillian looked bored. My fat little avitar was off screen most of the time - I think she'd found her own couch behind Jillian's back.

We did do every step of the cool-down routine. Actually "step" may be the wrong term. We stood on the balance beam and did arm stretches.

Then I had a piece of chocolate cake. Without ice cream.

I've been thinking

I was watching TV last week and somebody recommended that if you like mashed potatoes but don't want all the calories, you can substitute mashed cauliflower because it looks and tastes a lot like mashed potatoes. I'm thinking that if mashed cauliflower tastes like your mashed potatoes, you need a new recipe for mashed potatoes.

I've been thinking that some hot apple cider would taste pretty good. It's been about 20 degrees colder in Indiana than normal for this time of year and it's chilling me to the bones. You know, what? I don't think I'd say No to a piece of hot apple pie either. Do you like yours with cheese or ice cream? I'm an ice cream girl myself. I don't think cheese and apple pie really go together.

Do you know what tastes really good together? Raw apple slices and popcorn. Try it sometime, I think you'll like it.

I keep thinking I'm going to the Apple Store at Conner Prairie, but I only remember to think about it when I'm home and already been to where I was going and don't feel like going out again. It will probably close for the season before I remember to go.

Sometimes I like to ask my co-workers "What do you think?" and then I add "or do you bother to think at all?" So far, none of them have answered the second question.

Here's a fun thing to do when somebody says, "I've been thinking". Look surprised and ask, "Why, is it Tuesday?"