"You are also starting to feel overwhelmed by a force that seems to be bigger than you are. Very soon, though, you will recover your equilibrium. The future is much brighter than you may think." That was my horoscope for December 21st. It's eerily apropros to my life at the moment.
Did you ever read a horoscope that said something like "You are starting to feel overwhelmed by a force that seems to be bigger than you are. Well, honey, it is. You might as well just curl up in a ball and suck your thumb till the stars shift again because the next few months are gonna stink like used sweatsocks"?
Or "You don't really want to know today has in store for you, but let me extend my sympathy now"?
What about "You will finally get what you deserve over the next few weeks. So just cowboy up and can the whining 'cause nobody cares"?
On second thought, just tell it the way I want it to be.
This was my horoscope for today: "Brightly shone the moon that night, Though the frost was cruel, When a poor man came in sight, Gath'ring winter fuel. In the words of Good King Wenceslas, we hear a story about the ultimate irrelevance of worldly status. Some people seem to have it all, others appear to have nothing. Real wealth, though, has nothing to do with material fortune. It's about the ability to recognize the magic and majesty of a higher power. Whatever Christmas means to you, you are about to see evidence of a kindly cosmos."
I can hardly wait!
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