Twister

A few months ago I bought a box of VHS exercise tapes off e-Bay. I don't know why - it's not like I really planned to use them.

Yesterday, I noticed one that had strength training as well as step aerobics and having nothing better than housework to do, I thought I'd give it a go.

For those of you who don't know, step aerobics is doing an exercise routine on a wide, but short platform. I was too lazy to find my step, but beginners can start on the floor and get a good work-out.

It started out with walking in place for a warm-up. No problem. I can do that. Then the instructor, Cathe, cheerfully went into a step routine. It went something like:

Step up with the Left foot,

Step up with the Right foot,

Step down with the Left foot,

Step down with the Right foot,

Step leftleftrightrightleftleftdoublelefthopskipjumpheadstandleftup

Step rightrightrightupdowndownupbackkickstepleftuplefthigher up

"Keep those arms pumping!" Cathe encouraged cheerfully.

I couldn't even get my arms to swing together much less in the right direction with each step. Not that I could do each step. My left leg went up went it should have gone back while my right leg was trying to cross the left in front and in back at the same time it was trying to do the hop skip.

After about 10 or 60 minutes, Cathe cheerfully said, "Alright enough warmup. Let's step!"

Warmup? That was the warmup?

I sat down on the couch, popped open a Pepsi, and just (cheerfully) watched before I hurt myself.