I ought to be in pictures

I have signed on for another writing class. This one is called "Your Screenwriting Career". That's right, boys and girls, in six short weeks I'm going to be in the movies, or maybe Broadway!

This doesn't mean that I'm giving up on writing the next great American novel. Au contraire, mon ami. I just want to be ready. After 52 weeks on the best sellers list, my public will be demanding the book become a movie. Who better than moi, the author, to write the screenplay?

I think, like Alfred Hitchcock, I will make a brief, understated appearance in each movie. Hopefully standing next to the handsome leading man. Or maybe in his arms. I've always wondered what it would feel like wrapped in Tom Selleck's arms.

Someday, while sitting in a movie theather, you'll be able to nudge your friends, point to the screen, and say loudly enough for all to hear, "Look! Look! That short, pudgey woman standing next to Tom! I knew her when."

Play your cards right, mon ami, and you, too, could find yourself on a casting director's couch someday. Hey, you might even be in the movie!