This is kind of like those letters you get in your email threatening bad luck if you don't pass it along to 1,000 of your nearest and dearest friends. I stold it from "Suddenly Seniors" and cleaned it up a little, because, like I've warned you before, some of those old geezers are a little raunchy.
This is different than those stupid chain letters because (1) it's not in your email, (2) it's actually funny (if you have a warped sense of humor), and (3) nobody's threatening you with eternal damnation just because you don't read it.
Dear Friends,
When you are sad, I will help you plot revenge against the sorry buzzard who made you sad.
When you are blue, I'll try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
When you smile, I'll know you finally got lucky.
When you are scared, I will rag you about it every chance I get.
When you are worried, I will tell to quit whining and comfort you with horrible stories about how much worse it was when it happened to me.
When you are confused, I will use little words to explain it to you.
When you are sick, stay away from me until you're well again. I don't want whatever you have.
This is my oath, I pledge 'til the end.
Why you may ask? Because you're my friend!
Love,
Martha
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